Don’t Call Me Granny…I’m A Glam-Ma

Somewhere between labor pains and my last child moving out of the house…for good, a great deal of time was spent documenting the perfect “Kodak moments” of the perfect “Father Knows Best” family – mine.  Unlike remembering the joy of being covered head to toe in baby explosion poop, I have pictures of my perfectly groomed baby girl and her little brother in front of the Eiffel Tower, at Disneyland’s Small World ride and splashing naked in our back yard baby pool.  The fact that shortly after that picture was taken our Labrador decided to join the fun, knocking over the kids and nearly drowning my son, is forgotten.  It’s not in the picture.

The fantasy of perfect parenting is a blessing that allows us to anticipate someday becoming a grandparent and entering into what other Grandparents will tell you is “the happiest time of their lives.”

What none of them admit, but I am here to tell you, is that becoming a grandparent catapults you right back into the not so glamorous aspects of being a parent…only this time without the “Kodak moments” and the last word.  It’s a dirty little secret we “grannies” hide from the newbies and only over a glass or two of wine will admit to each other.  It’s parenting without “time outs,” it’s parenting without the Secretary of Defense and boots on the ground Marines to back you up.  It’s hanging on a tether suspended over the Grand Canyon without a cell phone to call for help.  And, yes, it IS the happiest time of your life.

But, as Goldie Hawn said and the Today Show confirmed in their special report on Celebrity grandmothers (April 23rd, 2009,) the Boomer’s have a new vision of Grandparenting.  We are Glam-Mas.